11 ways you can tell the difference between Love and Infatuation
Infatuation and true love are two very different things; one is a strong feeling of lust that fades and the other is a serious emotion that makes you want to build a life with someone else. You need to be able to know the difference so that you don’t end up ruining a good relationship by doing the wrong thing.
1) You love them for who they are
If you love them for who they are then it’s true love. You’re attracted to them as a whole person and aren’t fixated on one thing like you would if it was infatuation where something is driving you crazy about them. With true love you find them funny, smart or kind and want to spend time with them so you can get to know them better. You appreciate what makes them different from everybody else and don’t want to change them because they’re perfect despite their flaws.
2) You don’t mind waiting for sex
Infatuation is all about lust and sex so when you feel this way you’re willing to have a one night stand because all you want is them as soon as possible. When there’s strong feelings involved like true love then you don’t mind waiting awhile for sex because you want it to happen at the right time. You’ll also make more of an effort to make it good for both of you instead of being focused on your own desires.
3) You’re in it for the long term
Infatuation doesn’t last long and you’ll get tired of them quickly because someone else will catch your eye. If it’s more than that then you’ll want to be with them long term. You’ll think about whether or not they’re worth dating seriously and will do things like take their feelings into consideration and making sure they feel the same way about you.
4) You overlook their flaws
Everyone has flaws and you won’t put up with theirs if your feelings for them weren’t strong. You’ll break up and try to find someone that doesn’t annoy you and you won’t feel bad about it. If you love them you’ll overlook their flaws because it’s not worth breaking up over because they have other qualities that you value. You’ll tell yourself it’s not a big deal and will either gently let them know what bothers you or will focus on things that you love about them as a way to ignore the bad parts.
5) You make an effort to make the relationship work
If it’s a sex based or emotion based relationship then you’ll only make a minimal effort because you don’t care if it lasts long, you just want to get what you’re craving. You know it’s serious when you make an effort at having a successful relationship and will do things to make them happy. You’ll do things like remember their favourite foods or movies, important work projects or anything else they care about because you want to show them that it matters to you.
6) You trust them with important things
If you know your feelings for them aren’t strong or deep then you’re going to keep a distance from them. You won’t trust them with important things because you know the relationship isn’t serious. When you feel true love for someone you want them to know everything about you and you’ll trust them with your secrets, fantasies and fears because you know that it’s safe to be vulnerable with them. You know that they’ll support you and won’t judge you because they care for you and would never hurt you.
7) You only want them
With infatuation you’re going to keep your options open and will keep browsing adult dating sites for hot hookups because you have no real feelings for them. You’ll know you’re in love when you only want them and want to be in a monogamous relationship because you know that the single life isn’t as good anymore. They’ll fulfill your needs enough that you don’t need anyone else and you’re happy being with them.
8) You’re willing to deal with issues
When an issue happens you can either deal with it or not and that depends on how you really feel about them. It’s not love if you break up as soon as something goes wrong because you don’t want to deal with it. When you’re willing to talk things through and find a solution that makes both of you happy then you know that it’s a healthy relationship that’s based on respect and love. You want things to feel good between the two of you and want to form a solid bond with them.
9) You want to spend your life with them
Infatuation fades and the relationship will be short and sweet. They’re someone you want to have a good time with and when it’s over you’ll move on. They’re not the type of person you want to spend the rest of your life with because it’s based on superficial feelings. When you do feel like you want to be with them forever and are thinking about getting married or having children then you know you have real feelings for them. You’ll try to find out if they want the same things and will work to make it a reality.
10) You make them a part of your life
You don’t let someone get too close and become a part of your life if you know the relationship isn’t going to last. With infatuation you get caught up in the moment and are completely focused on them because nothing else matters to you. Building a life with someone takes time and work which means you’ll only make an effort once you know they’re the one for you. When you know you feel that way you’re going to make them a part of your life by telling them about yourself, introducing them to your family and friends, finding hobbies to do that interest both of you and eventually moving in together.
11) You feel happy and grateful around them
With infatuation you’ll feel excitement or desire but not much else. You’ll be okay when things end and understand that it wasn’t supposed to last forever. With true love you’re going to feel happy, loved and grateful to have found someone who completes you. The thought of being single again will upset you because you don’t want to be without them and will want to have a successful relationship.
She is working as writer for diferent websites. She has published many hand-books about adult dating and relationships.
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